Síguenos:




Número 24 - Junio de 2011   

Rincón apócrifo
Memoria de mis burras tristes.
Fernando Mora Meléndez. Ilustraciones X10

Para algunos detractores, el realismo mágico es una enfermedad tropical tan contagiosa como poco estudiada. Se dice que basta leer una página de El Amor en los tiempos del Cólera para adquirir el virus. En algunos escritores no se manifiesta, aunque “el tintineo de sus metáforas los delata”. No falta quién ensaye día y noche queriendo igualarse al genio de Aracataca. La idea de imitar a otros autores es tan vieja como los evangelios apócrifos. Hubo plumas, como Avellaneda, que se atrevieron a tanto como escribir la segunda parte del Quijote antes que Cervantes. En honor a este divertimento, llamado pastiche, abrimos una sección que ojalá peleche más que la piratería: el rincón apócrifo. ¡Y que viva Gabo!

 
Ilustración X10

Era inevitable. La tarde en que Pilar Ternera me dejó plantado, de punta en blanco, con el cuento peregrino de la regla, tuve que regresar a mi cuarto a aliviar por mano propia y en soliloquio los reclamos inclementes de la pinga. En las primeras de Cambio, no encontré a mi alcance ninguna deidad en cueros que inspirara mis caricias y necesité quince minutos con sus segundos para darme cuenta que la mía sería una paja franciscana.

Me eché en mi jergón de perro, obnubilado por el ardor ahumado de Ternera que se filtraba por los resquicios de las paredes. Repetí esa palabra como un conjuro para entrar en calor. Pero al decir Ternera por tercera vez sin que surtiera efecto, decidí cambiarlo por su nombre de pila: Pilar, menos largo y más romántico. Tuve que cerrar los ojos para imaginarla como Dios la trajo al mundo, sin bicicleta, pero con un par de tetas. Las mismas que no pude sopesar porque ese mismo día mi abuelo había prometido llevarme a ver el hielo. Desde entonces, los encuentros con ella se enfriaron sin remedio. Me lo hizo saber, además, con una frase premonitoria y con ese tono de gitana asmática: “Como no me paraste bolas el día que nos convenía, ahora vas a ver como te sale un pelo de marrano en la palma de la mano”. La frase hizo estragos en el momento soberano de deslizar la palma por los entresijos de mis calzoncillos. Me detuve, atormentado con la idea de que si pensaba en ella, sólo iba a conseguir que mi pájaro cerrara su único ojo somnoliento y no habría poder humano que lo levantara de su siesta de mal agüero.

Hice un esfuerzo sobrenatural por continuar con mi consuelo de Onán. Para concentrarme, trate de disipar los aromas condimentados de la carne de Ternera, y dejar que el pulso firme e inspirado se valiera de otros recursos menos llaneros y más caribeños. Me asaltó la imagen del último desfile de diosas coronadas por Raimundo y todo el mundo. Ante este mal de vereda, hasta una tercera princesa me sacaría de apuros. Busqué entre los cajones repletos de remedios y papeles el ejemplar de la revista y tardé sólo cinco minutos para lanzar dos conjeturas. O bien se la había regalado a Plinio, que la quería conservar porque estaba retratado a mi lado en las páginas sociales; o bien la había tirado a la basura después de perder la paciencia con un crucigrama endiablado. Sin la ayuda fotográfica a la vista, acudí al salvavidas del recuerdo. Imaginé los cuerpos de las candidatas en traje de baño, sin dejar a un lado ni a la señorita Vichada. Pero el deseo salió espantado de mi catre ante la sola idea de tocar una teta sintética. Sobre todo ahora en el año de mis noventa, cuando acataba el consejo de mi Sabio Catalán de sólo consumir lo natural.

Ya empezaba a resignarme a la falta de inspiración, cuando en un trance de memoria involuntaria se me apareció como una revelación mi burra de adolescencia. Estaba allí, amarrada a un tronco de guayacán sietemesino. Tenía las grupas suaves y la mirada impúdica de su estirpe. Me subí en el taburete de los iniciados para poder alcanzar sus belfos traseros, húmedos y a la espera. Me sentía tan feliz, que la besaba en la cola y ella me correspondía con un remolino de succiones. La equina no decía ni mú y aún así me dictaba las primeras vocales del amor. La amé hasta la empuñadura, mientras aspiraba su vaho espeso y su olor a cuido silvestre y a melaza. Ante el desenlace feliz sentí deslizar mis manos por sus grupas sedosas que pronto descubrí: eran una almohada. Cuando volví en mí tuve la cítrica certeza de que una burra de pura paja no podía exorcizar a la Pilar Ternera de carne y hueso. Pero en vez de suicidarme con aceite de ricino, acudí a las palabras del Sabio: “las mujeres, a diferencia de las burras, te lo dan cuando ellas quieren, pero no cuando tú lo necesitas”.

Muchos días después, frente al pelotón de Fidel, habría de mirar la palma de mi mano donde empezaba a brotarme la cerda de marrano, y me preguntaría por vez primera si los pajizos del mundo volveríamos a tener una segunda oportunidad sobre la estera. UC

Ilustración X10

  Name  
  Email
  Comment  
Imagen CAPTCHA
Enter the code shown above

In a span of just a few years, the restaurant juggernaut known as Major Food Group has opened multiple sceney hits (Carbone, Dirty French, Santina); colonized the city with its Longchamp more casual Parm delis; and secured a lease on one of the city’s great restaurant locations (the Four Seasons space, which it will take over later this year after Coach Purses the current tenant’s lease expires in July). But there’s one thing the group has never done, until now: a real burger.Last week, they quietly added a towering Club Cheeseburger michael kors ($26) — a beefy riff on the club sandwich, hence the name — to the dinner menu at their buzzing Eastern European-influenced spot Sadelle’s (463 West Broadway).“We just never Longchamp Handbags felt [a burger] fit any of the concepts we did in the past,” says Major Food Group partner Jeff Zalaznick. “We were just waiting for the right moment.”
When michael kors purses the potential payoff is an immediately tighter face, it’s no wonder FaceLove has plenty of devotees signing up. “We have addicts,” says Lang. Prices range from $10 for a coach purses mini “Skin Juice Booster” to $65 for a 30-minute signature treatment.Enjoyable as it may be, some doctors are skeptical. New York super derm Dennis Gross says the effects are michael kors handbags short-lived at best. “Massage can relax facial muscles and take away the stress from specific areas, and it can also temporarily help lymphatic drainage that can prevent the look Longchamp Outlet of bloating,” he says. “[But] there is no scientific evidence that facial exercise and massage can help or hurt the aging process of skin.”Others, like Upper East Side doc michael kors outlet online Debra Jaliman, go so far as to say that stretching triggers droopiness. “The more the face moves, the deeper the creases and wrinkles,” she writes in “Skin Rules: Trade coach outlet Secrets From a Top New York Dermatologist” (St. Martin’s Press).Lang will argue the opposite is true in an upcoming book. “The new science, and the fact that we’re measuring michael kors outlet clearance skin in this new way, will start filtering down to all the professionals and doctors tasked with anti-aging,” she says.
After sitting out the 2014 season while recovering from michael kors outlet Tommy John surgery, Harvey returned in 2015, joining Noah Syndergaard and Jacob deGrom in what became the most electrifying pitching staff in baseball. In a rollicking postseason run, the Longchamp Bags team reached the World Series and faced off against the Kansas City Royals. But the storybook season ended in Game 5. Harvey, during an otherworldly performance, refused to let michael kors outlet online sale his manager, Terry Collins, take him off the mound going into the ninth inning, and the Mets eventually lost the game and with it the series. Fans and sports Coach Outlet Store writers piled on both Collins and his pitcher, but the unflappable big leaguer is at peace with his actions.“No regrets,” he says of the moment. “I felt great. I coach handbags felt I could go out there and do everything I could to keep runs off the board. I was very passionate about the game and it showed. And it Michael Kors Outlet Online was something I really wanted. And unfortunately it didn’t work out.”With no parade down the Canyon of Heroes, Harvey decamped to Mystic, Conn., where he spent some time with michael kors his family, and then treated pals to an Aspen vacation. Unlike his teammates who stay in their home states during the off-season, Harvey returned to the city. He starts coach outlet online his days with Pilates in Long Island, then drives to Citi Field for a sweat session. He also spent a month in Newport Beach, Calif., training with other players michael kors bags across the league to prepare for spring training.When he wasn’t hitting the gym, Harvey took advantage of all New York has to offer. In November, he sat front row Longchamp Bag at the Victoria’s Secret show and watched as his then-rumored girlfriend Devon Windsor hit the runway in a barely-there blue-and-green bodysuit with wings. He joined New York Jet Eric Michael Kors Handbags Decker, Giant Victor Cruz and Olivia Palermo’s model husband Johannes Huebl as CFDA ambassadors for Men’s Fashion Week in February.“It was a cool experience and great to hang with Michael Kors Purses those guys,” says Harvey, who names the John Varvatos show as his highlight. He even appeared on Bravo’s “Watch What Happens Live,” where he let loose and divulged to Michael Kors Bags host Andy Cohen that while attending the University of North Carolina, he engaged in sex on the baseball field. “Yeah, you can’t believe everything you hear all the time,” coach factory outlet he says with a playful smile when pressed about the admission. And he moved his home base from a one-bedroom in the East Village to a three-bedroom bachelor pad Coach Bags in the West Village.
When Trey proposed to Charlotte in a famous episode of “Sex and the City,” only one ring would do: a hefty diamond perched in a coach factory classic Tiffany setting.Now that iconic six-prong design — which was unveiled by Charles Lewis Tiffany the same year the Statue of Liberty made her debut — is celebrating 130 Coach Outlet Store Online years as the most famous sparkler style in the world.Before 1886, almost all engagement rings buried their stones deep in a bezel of ornate bands. But Tiffany, disruptor that Coach Handbags he was, created a design that lifted round, brilliant diamonds high above a smoothly elegant band, allowing them to dazzle in the light. He also pared down the metal michael kors outlet prongs, unveiling as much of the rock as possible.This revealing new setting — along with mining company De Beers’ aggressive marketing campaign in the 1930s — undoubtedly contributed to Coach Outlet diamonds becoming the de rigueur stone for wedding proposals in America.“Over time, more and more couples chose the Tiffany setting,” notes Melvyn Kirtley, the chief gemologist for Tiffany & Michael Kors Co. “To this day, it’s the most sought-after engagement ring” from the retailer.Indeed, industry experts say that while vintage halo settings (with pavé diamonds encircling a central stone) are Michael Kors Outlet now trending — constituting up to 22 percent of engagement rings, according to the Knot’s 2015 “Jewelry & Engagement Study” — the classic Tiffany solitaire setting continues to lead the pack.“[It’s] set the engagement ring style standard for decades — solitaires, including the Tiffany setting, are still the most desired settings Longchamp Outlet for brides,” confirms Amanda Gizzi, spokeswoman for the nonprofit association Jewelers of America.Makes sense, since a single set diamond is a versatile workhorse that rounds out infinite style vibes, michael kors outlet from pared-down prep to full-on flashy.The style has become so ubiquitous that, much like the brand name Kleenex being employed to describe any tissue, a “Tiffany setting” is used michael kors outlet online for any ring with that iconic shape. But there’s still only one little blue box.
Rihanna has taken her own lyric “shine bright like a diamond” to heart.Less than michael kors outlet one week after Saint Laurent’s fall showing of decadent ’80s party clothes styled with the now-ubiquitous crystal-covered slouchy booties, the singer with a penchant for flashy wares was already michael kors outlet online spotted wearing the coveted boots last night in Paris.She styled them with shredded denim pants and an over-sized black leather jacket. A sleek ponytail and over-sized hoops completed her Coach Outlet Online rocker glam look.The fashion plate posted a trio of Instagram pics that read as a starry-eyed ode to the boots, with captions like “obsessed” to “phresh out da runway.”Because Longchamp Sale even Riri knows, if you didn’t ‘gram it, did it ever really happen?

Bags Outlet Sale: Coach Wallet Longchamp Le Pliage Michael Kors Handbags On Sale Coach Outlet Store Online coach factory store michael kors outlet online sale

coach factory store  14/mar./2017 07:20:

fb app in your Android device. keep in contact with your pals everywhere, every time. speedy and comfy download. hp driver download

smith  28/feb./2017 02:46:

HMD Global announced the Nokia 3310 new mobile phone with some new features at MWC 17 in Barcelona on Sunday. New Nokia 3310 is comeback with back camera, large display, more thick than its predecessor, an FM radio and many other features. It also have a Snake but with new version. HMD also announced some more Nokia upcoming phones at Mobile World Congress.

Hussain  27/feb./2017 08:29:

bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama . bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama bbm versi lama

saya  27/feb./2017 04:06:

aplikasi bbm terbaru lihat selengkapnya aplikasi bbm terbaru lihat selengkapnya aplikasi bbm terbaru lihat selengkapnya aplikasi bbm terbaru lihat selengkapnya .

kmau  05/feb./2017 02:20:

I will immediately grab your rss feed as I can not find your email subscription link or enewsletter service. Do you've any? Please let me know in order that I could subscribe. Thanks. dacdeeeedcdegdcd

Smithg429  05/feb./2017 12:50:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...